Do you make it up?

Category: Let's talk

Post 1 by OrangeDolphinSpirit (Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?) on Sunday, 08-Jan-2006 4:48:14

I notice that a lot of blind people I know do this. I was hanging out with two of my good friends this weekend, both of whom are blind, and I couldn't help noticing something. Here, I'll give you an example of how the conversation went.

Friend 1. "I told him, and he looked at me like, 'OK, this chick is crazy'. It was funny!"

Friend 2. "Oh, my gosh, I know what you mean! My mom always gives me a funny look when I tell her the same thing!"

And here I am, thinking, how in the world do they know what kind of look someone is giving them? I was wondering if maybe they just put it in there--you know, make it up--to spice up the story or whatever. You guys know what I mean? Maybe it's normal because I mean, so many people say things like that. I'm wondering if it's even a conscious thing?

Post 2 by HauntedReverie (doing the bad mango) on Sunday, 08-Jan-2006 4:58:08

I do it, it's almost like you can sense the way someone's looking at you. I dunno

Post 3 by InternetKing (the Zone BBS remains forever my home page) on Sunday, 08-Jan-2006 5:02:02

I think it's dumb really. In my personal opinion it's just blind people trying to be cool or kinda trying to say that thyey're normal. There are other ways to prove that you're normal then trying to talk how you know if someone's giving you evil looks even though there's no way you can see it. Then there's other extreme, those idiots who refuse to say that for example they saw something on TV, but because they can't see they can say something like that. In my opinion both extremes are just that, stupid unneceserry extremes. You can't see so why should you pretend that you do. On the other hand you're not gonna say that you listend to something on TV or that you heard your friend yesterday when they came in to your house, because it just sounds dumb. That's what I think anyway.

Post 4 by OrangeDolphinSpirit (Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?) on Sunday, 08-Jan-2006 5:07:04

LOL. I know what you mean, Vanja. I have to admit that I do the whole "he/she gave me a look" thing, though. But see, I pay attention to tone of voice mostly, so I can pretty much guess what kind of look they'd have on their face, so I don't do it to be "normal". It's just ... one of those things.

Post 5 by nikos (English words from a Greek thinking brain) on Sunday, 08-Jan-2006 6:04:52

In my conversations i never say about people giving me funny looks because i don't know and i don't care either. I prefear to concentrate on the things they say but i use expressions like watch television or when somebody wants to show me something i might say let's have a look. It wouldn't sound good if i said let's have a touch.

Post 6 by OrangeDolphinSpirit (Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?) on Sunday, 08-Jan-2006 7:11:32

Yeah, I agree with you, Nikos!

Post 7 by sparkie (the hilljack) on Sunday, 08-Jan-2006 20:23:30

I can guess look by tone of voice as well.
Troy

Post 8 by Perestroika (Her Swissness) on Tuesday, 10-Jan-2006 4:22:17

well, i can tell by tone of voice to how someone is most likely looking at me, and so it's just easier to say, they gave me such and such a look.

Post 9 by SingerOfSongs (Heresy and apostasy is how progress is made.) on Wednesday, 11-Jan-2006 7:55:47

I can tell sometimes. I can't tell you how, but I can. It usually only really happens with people I know well though. Also, sometimes people mention the looks people give to you. I don't say "they looked at me like" often, but sometimes I do.

Post 10 by dissonance (Help me, I'm stuck to my chair!) on Saturday, 11-Feb-2006 17:36:45

I do it absent-mindedly. It's not that I'm trying to sound cool or whatever, it's just, I don't know, it sounds stupid to say I could sense that he was looking at me like, or I don't know. but I've never really thought about it, now I'll always be all conscious about it, thanks a lot. jk

Post 11 by yellowcat (Zone BBS Addict) on Saturday, 11-Feb-2006 18:00:55

oh oh - somthing else to worry about... LOL I have some sight but I still don't know if people, even people close up are looking at me !!

Post 12 by Nage (Your father's friend's daughter's roommate's niece) on Sunday, 12-Feb-2006 10:34:55

Hmm. I've never really thought about it till now. But well it's something I do unconciously. Besides you can tell how they're looking at you by their tone of voice, or I dunno you just can tell. Lols and let's have a touch?? haha, I might just say that for kicks one day! What funny looks would I get then? Lol!

Post 13 by Manwe (The Dark Lord) on Sunday, 12-Feb-2006 10:54:55

it's a funny thing. because actually? i didn't actually think about it. usually you can tell from the way someone speaks or the feelings you get from the person as to how you think they are with you. this is the thing.

Post 14 by sugar (Entertain me. I dare you.) on Sunday, 12-Feb-2006 15:52:48

Hmm, I disagree with most of you on this one. I don't think you can tell how someone's looking at you as a result of something you do, or a conversation you have, I think you can just tell my their whole ora and wa of being in response to something. I may say something like, you could jsut tell they thought i was crazy, etc etc, but look is never a word I've used coz I don't think it's the look that tells you what your sensing. I know a lot of people who have been said to give funny looks when they actually mean nothing by it. I know that I do, but didn't want to use that as an example on it's own because it could be perceived that, as I am blind, I might just be looking and not know what I am doing, which is possible, but that doesnt' excuse fully sighted people from doing it does it?

Post 15 by Manwe (The Dark Lord) on Sunday, 12-Feb-2006 18:25:52

ora, an interesting way of putting it, not inaccurate, but to look is to perceive whether it be rightly or wrongly. to look is to see or to try and see. just because you look at something it doesn't mean that you understand it. but what people give off, whether you call it an ora or what ever you wish to call it, yes you can see alot from it i think that is definitely accurate to say.

Post 16 by changedheart421 (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Monday, 13-Feb-2006 1:11:53

i have a friend who is a total but swore she could read text messages. also she would say o that is mike texting me and he is a jerk. people sometimes put things in to things interest themselves.

Post 17 by midnight sun (you can't catch me, i'm the palobread man) on Monday, 13-Feb-2006 7:32:23

lets say this. sighted people always look, and from what they say or what they are thinking you can tell the way they are looking at you.
I just can't understand people who don't use the word see or look when talking with us. I always say I saw a movie, and someone says, you mean you heard it? hear a movie? damn it movies are seen not heard, get over it!

Post 18 by Manwe (The Dark Lord) on Monday, 13-Feb-2006 8:03:18

lol. you know i don't even think about what i say it just comes naturally. sometimes i will say either, but it's not a concious thing

Post 19 by andy.bailey (i try to be intellijant, it dont always work thow.) on Friday, 30-Jun-2006 7:39:47

dam who gives a fuck like some one els sed just another thing to be conchuss off lol i say it lodes i used to have site so....! but i agry u can here in someones voice if u no them well inuff how they may be looking or perseeveing what u have sed. and as for saying having a tuch? or a feel? dam! lock up your dorters! i am on the rampage! lol hehehehehehe

andy!B

Post 20 by nikos (English words from a Greek thinking brain) on Friday, 30-Jun-2006 8:29:36

I was playing one of the all in play games once, and because i said in my profile that i like bird watching, somebody said do you mean bird listening? It was funny.
I said that it would sound funny if i said bird listening and i asked him if he says listen to the television and he said that i was right. I say he but i am not sure if it was he or she but anyway. It doesn't matter.

Post 21 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Friday, 30-Jun-2006 8:41:49

I think it boils down to how "normal" do we want to appear. I never say "someone gave me a dirty look" or anything because I don't know if they did or not, and even if I could sense it, I probably wouldn't know what that sense was. So, should I say such a thing it would merely bring attention to the fact that I didn't know what I was talking about.

Post 22 by Mexican Spitfire (Eating the elephant one bite at a time.) on Friday, 30-Jun-2006 11:34:17

When I say something that other people don't expect me to come up with, I always tell them, "Don't look at me that way."! Guessing that they might have a strange look on their faces. I just do it to have a good sense of humor. It's not to be stupid or hide my disability. Or to pretend I have something I don't. We have to keep a sense of humor about some things or they'll drive us over the edge. Agree?

Post 23 by wildebrew (We promised the world we'd tame it, what were we hoping for?) on Friday, 30-Jun-2006 12:03:51

Aah, we should never ever say stuff we can't back up e.g. if you wait "forever" you better wstill be waiting, if your love is hotter than the sun you better be able to use it to fuse hydrogen atoms, if the pen is really stronger than the sword you better go out and stab those sword wielding bastards with your pen and break their swords, if you are dead tired, you beter explain to us what it is and most of all, if you "watch" tv you better be able to tell us, without help, what color clothes Jack Nickolson was wearing in that movie.

Post 24 by lalady (This site is so "educational") on Friday, 30-Jun-2006 14:12:09

Well, it's like this with me! I grew up sighted and all of my family members and friends at school were sighted also. I lost my sight in my 20's. Now 30 plus years later, I still use the see and look words and don't plan to change just to accommodate someone else! They'll just have to get over it if it bothers them!

Post 25 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Friday, 30-Jun-2006 15:34:17

Damn, this is a good topic. Whoever started it (I'm too lazy to go look), thanks. I mean, I'm too lazy to go listen to jaws read...

Post 26 by motifated (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Friday, 30-Jun-2006 15:38:53

I agree with all those who say they don't change their vocabulary. I must say that it is possible to sense looks. I can feel it when people stare at me on occasion. You can also tell by an inhalation of breath on the part of the "looker" or if there's an awkward pause in the conversation. I've been married for over 20 years, and my wife gives me "the look" when she's displeased with me. Lou

Post 27 by firebolt (Veteran Zoner) on Monday, 10-Jul-2006 22:55:21

Interesting topic indeed. Wildebrew, I think you're overstating it a bit. Our language would be dull and colorless if we don't use figures of speech. Any inteligent person would know that when you say your love is hotter than the sun you don't mean it literally. Like many of us said before, it is silly or funny or unnatural to say "I heard a movie on tv". Sometimes I can tell what kind of look I get from people and sometimes I say they gave me a look, but not often. Just because a blind person uses the words "look" or "see", that doesn't necesarily mean they're trying to be cool or deny their disability. When some sighted person comments on the use of "look" or "see", I tell them I can see in my own way. To make things more understandable for kids, I say that I can see with my ears or hands, that these are the tools I use to get around.

Post 28 by jessmonsilva (Taking over the boards, one topic at a time.) on Monday, 10-Jul-2006 23:04:24

Hmmm I do it sometimes, but it's mostly a subconscious thing. I really don't realize I say it till I'm done saying it.

Post 29 by Chris N (I just keep on posting!) on Monday, 10-Jul-2006 23:08:43

I'd get a stranger look if I said that I heard something on tv than if I simply said that I saw something. I use such words in my vocabulary all the time. They don't necessarily refer to a pair of eyes.

Post 30 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Tuesday, 11-Jul-2006 19:36:54

I am the only blind person in my family, so having grown up around sighted brothers and parents and their friends, using words like look and watch and se is just second nature to me. I can't detect anybody giving me this look or that, but I can guess somebody might potentially give me an odd look if I said something that would provoke such a thing. It really blows my mind how if we talk to sighted strangers and use words that are common in their communication that they insist we speak literally and not figuratively, as if by saying we watch a movie we're trying to pretend we're sighted. Remember that all these words have definitions other than to literally use one's eyes. To watch a movie can mean to take it in or experience it.

Post 31 by wildebrew (We promised the world we'd tame it, what were we hoping for?) on Wednesday, 12-Jul-2006 10:37:36

I wsa being sarcastic people, I thought my post obviously showed that, then again sometimes things are just obvious when it's you posting them <grin>.

Post 32 by AngelKisses (An angel with no Halo) on Thursday, 30-Nov-2006 10:19:43

Well Allie, you know me and my animated voice. Well I don't say " she looked at me like this" I just make my voice go and she was like huh? and by that most blind people can get the facial expression on their own. But Since I was sighted before, I have excellent facial expressions still. Sometimes someone will say something and I'll just look at them like they've totally lost their mind and they'll start cracking up, but then I've got Edd over there going what's so funny? So they tell him I looked at them like they were crazy and he just doesn't get it. Since he has always been blind, it's just like why don't you just say it instead of looking at them in a funny way. But, to answer the question. No, I don't say she or he looked like and bla. So yeah.

Post 33 by OrangeDolphinSpirit (Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?) on Thursday, 30-Nov-2006 13:20:26

Wow, I was surprised to see this topic revived. *GRIN* I read through so many responses I hadn't read before, so ... maybe it's a good thing somebody dug it up. LOL.
Yes, Wildebrew, I certainly did pick up on your sarcasm. I used to think that blind people should say they "listened" to the TV and that they "heard" a movie, but so many of us blind people feel like being treated as equals, and that would just draw attention to our blindness, so I'm not so sure I like that idea anymore.